Yesterday morning I dozily awoke at about quarter past seven. I could have sworn I heard the door bell so got up and looked. Noone there.

Bursting for the loo, I walk through to the toilet and see a tall bloke in the back garden using a mobile phone. This freaks me out a little. Some random in your garden at unheard of times in the morning is really rather worrying.

He walks down the side of the house and I follow him. With a rather fast beating heart, I open the front door to challenge this intruder. Only to find it's Big Richard.

He'd apparantly got back from working at the Cube and realised he'd lost his key. He rang the doorbell once and noone answered. He didn't ring again because he didn't want to wake anyone up!?!

He then decided to try sleeping in the back garden and after an hour was so cold he was on the verge of throwing up. So he decamped to ECS. He got chucked out of there at half six and then went for another look for his keys at the Union. They weren't there.

So he decided to come back at try the house again. But once more, he had no intention of ringing the door bell more than once. He's lucky I needed that wee!

Silly. Silly silly. In future, if anyone is locked out of my house, ring me or keep your finger on the door bell. Noone should be locked out of their own house, especially on a freezing October night.

Latest news is that someone thinks they've seen the keys in the Entertainments managers office at the Union. So he's going to have a look this morning.

Good luck, Rich.