I realise it's a taboo subject and something that most people consider rather personal, but it's only by conforming to that mindset that we stay ignorant... A couple of weeks ago I went for an appointment at the Chelmsford sexual health clinic for a complete sexually transmitted infection screening. It was today I had to phone for the results.

The tests consisted of a blood test, normal run off the mill vial of blood taken; a urine test, again a standard pee into this beaker instruction; and a swab from just inside the penis, uncomfortable but certainly not painful. Together, these three tests screen for all the known STIs. I was in the clinic for about a couple of hours in total and the results took 2 weeks to come through.

I have to say I'm rather impressed with the NHS. This whole service is provided free of charge and all the staff involved were efficient and helpful and extremely sensitive about the whole thing. My inexperience of the process wasn't frowned upon or belittled; everything was explained to me carefully.

Thankfully the results all came back clear, but don't get your hopes up because I'm not sleeping with you. ;-)